"I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for approval, I can tell you I don't have any. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills -- skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you leave my language alone right now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will punctuate you."

Sunday, June 9, 2013

Muff Said

"What are you giggling about?"

I ran across a couple of funny instances of a word - well, actually the word itself and a homophone of it. I'm re-reading the original Sherlock Holmes stories after enjoying BBC's Sherlock series (which I highly recommend. It's available for streaming on Netflix).

I had a prurient giggle over this sentence in The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Adventure III - A Case of Identity: “She pulled a little handkerchief out of her muff, and began to sob heavily into it.” That is a strange place to carry one's hanky.

A couple of days later, we ordered pizza from Papa Murhphy's. Included with each pizza are the cooking instructions, which in turn included this coupon:

Looks innocent enough, right?

Take a closer look at the fine print. Oh, here, I'll do it for you:

Oh my god! What!?
I couldn't even pruriently giggle because the idea of a miniature one was too unsettling.

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